Feel like bitch slappin' someone...
11:31 a.m. - 2007-10-26

Well, Hombre has not been working since Monday. There just aren't enough jobs coming in. He got his big ass utility van running, and it appears to me that he's hinting around at having me get insurance on it. I really don't want to, nor do I think I owe him this. But then again, we will have a vehicle to get around in to get groceries, and what not...get BabyGirl to her dance practices and stuff. Right now, I have to constantly ask his mother for rides, and I really hate doing that.

But, on the other hand, I just want to be a bitch about it and let him figure out how to get that thing on the road. Why should I always find the fucking answer to shit? I want to get MY CAR RUNNING!!!!

I WANT MY OWN MOTHERFUCKING CAR BACK!!!

Can I trade it in in it's present condition? I know I'll lose a shitload of money, but will car dealerships let you do something like that? I mean, I do not have $5000 in my pocket to get the thing fixed. I'm grasping at straws here! Anyone got any suggestions?

It's gonna piss me off if he gets his van running, and I'm left with SHIT! A big pile of fucking shit!

I think I pissed him off last night, too. I was telling him how my hips and the heels of my feet have really, really been bothering me. I jokingly said, "Watch me end up having something like bone cancer..."

He replied, "Shit, I'm the one who's gonna end up dying from some shit like that." He was talking about his smoking, and drinking, and just general bad habits.

"Yeah, but you've had all the bad stuff happen to you already and you made it. Me, I think I'm due for something major. Lately, nothing happens to you. Like with the car. You crash the car, you don't get hurt, you don't get arrested, you don't even get a damn ticket! Then you're months behind on your child support for LilHombre, and you go to your show-cause hearing, and the guy tells you he had every intention of putting you in jail, but then he decides to give you a chance. Again, nothing happens. Me on the other hand, I almost lose our house, I don't have a car nor anyway to get it fixed. I might end up getting laid off with all these damn changes. It's like you're fucking charmed or something, and I Badluck-Shleprock!"

OK...so I got a little dramatic, and a little pissed. I was being mean, I know I was...BUT IT FELT FUCKING GOOD TO MEAN TO HIM!

But of course, now I feel bad. He just stood there looking at me, kinda shocked, and I think a little hurt. But you know what...I'm still pissed about my car! Everyone is just sitting back waiting to see what I'm going to do to get my car fixed!

Damnit! I'm fucking tired of having to be the responsible one every motherfucking time shit hit the motherfucking fan!!!

Gah...I think I'm PMS'ing. I really feel like slapping somebody right now.

OK...I will not dwell on this right now. I'll be back when I'm in a better mood..

Sorry, ya'll!

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